BuzzFeed Unleashes Advanced New Headline Technology

"Everything Plus."
(I meant to put this on Disputations.)
"Everything Plus."
(I meant to put this on Disputations.)
But is it Double Plus Good?
Yup. Tell me about your exciting day.
Oh no, not another one!
You might want to check where you are.
Is that Senator Fred Thompson?
Allow me to rephrase the question. Is that Senator Fred Thompson?
Have they ever done, "Jennifer Garner Got A New Haircut And It Is, OMG I Can't Even"? Because headlines should sound like queeny gay flight attendants wherever possible.
I know it's Buzzfeed and I know it's going to be completely unedifying, but I still want to click on that story about the cancelled rave.
That's the story of my buzzfeed life. And given enough net boredom, I'll prolly eventually click on it and hate myself for it.